The Dump

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Making Us Proud (and Paulie) (2006) Yesterday, Angie was out running some errands, and I was home with the kids late in the afternoon.  With the Super Bowl quickly approaching, the kids needed dinner.  At about 5:45, I started preparing their leftover spaghetti.  I shooed them into the family room with their sippy cups filled with their default drink -- Jay's with water and Danielle's with chocolate milk. I heard them having a good time, which was of course an immediate alarm.  I looked in the room to find Danielle with her back to the rear door and Jay facing her, standing on the coffee table, about half way across the room.  The table was splattered with chocolate milk as was Danielle's chin.  During the moment between when I looked and when I reacted, I realized what was going on.  The kids were taking drinks from their cups then spitting across the room at one another.  Two of the three of us thought that was a great idea. --- Mike: "Jay, what...

Roosevelt (2007) Jay often poses this unprompted, mindbending offer: "I'm a baby kitty cat, and you can call me whatever you want to call me."  There are two ways to answer this, and they are: 1) "Can I call you... Roosevelt?" - Jay will be overjoyed that you have chosen of your own volition to call them "Roosevelt", or as Jay says "Rose a belt". 2) Any answer not involving "Roosevelt" - so, for example, you might reply "Hmm, since you said I can call you  anything I want to call you , and you are the one who offered that in the first place without any prompting at all, how about if I call you Patches?"  Jay will always reply to any statement such as the above (saying anything other than "Roosevelt") by stating "Well, you can call me Rose a belt." Over the summer, we visited Wisconsin to attend and participate in Uncle Elliott and Aunt Liz's wedding.  As is their nature, the kids were impressed by t...

Meet Jay Kaas (2007) Typical for their age, Jay and Danielle often pretend they're someone else or that their name is something else.  They regularly pretend they're the Backyardigans, for example.  On occasion, Jay pretends her name is "Jay Kaas."  Kaas (pronounced Koss) is Angie's maiden name, and so Jay sometimes hears the name used in conversation. The other day, Jay told Angie that their name is Jay Kaas.  Angie explained to Jay that Kaas is Angie's maiden name and that before she was married to me, her name was Angie Kaas.  Danielle heard this and asked "What did you look like when your name was Angie Kaas?"

I realized I never added some definitely relevant context: Angie is my mom. Danielle is my twin sister. We were born in May 2003, so you can calculate ages accordingly. I decided to cut a story today, and will probably cut future ones. It’s very Danielle-centric and only mentions me a couple times, only in relation to Danielle. It talks about developmental stuff and I don’t know how she’d feel about me resharing that, so I’m just not gonna post it. I might cut some future stories too if they have the same issue. Lost and found (2010) We've warned Jay repeatedly that he is responsible for monitoring his stuffed animals' whereabouts.  He, we've told him, must keep track of where he puts his animals.  Otherwise, one day, he's going to lose one of them, we tell him. A while back, Fletch went missing.  Poof.  The usual questions (where was he last, did you bring him downstairs, did you bring him out of the house, etc.) did not help.  At first, we joked that he was ta...

Once again a stranger confronted me for wearing a mask. From a far distance and not obviously talking to me, just kinda putting it out there while I was the only one in a mask. Loudly. For some reason this is how every confrontation I’ve had about masking has gone. It is a very strange, non-committal way to approach a social interaction. Anyways, without further ado: Habit You’re sick You don’t want to get sick You don’t want to get others around you sick You think it’s gross that we’re just exchanging mouth juice all the time It’s cold It’s cold and windy If your nose is exposed to the cold your snot will literally freeze inside of it and then thaw when you go inside and you would very much like to avoid that experience It’s comfy It’s a style statement Intrigue Hiding insecurities Hiding features you love but want to have all to yourself Hiding your shitty mustache you’re growing out Hiding the acne you have from wearing a mask all the time Hiding your runny nose Catching tears befor...

This is the first time I’m posting one of these! These are pulled from my dad’s old blog about me and my sister. I’m hoping to post whatever he posted on the current date in the past :) They have been edited to switch around gender and name and whatever. Enjoy! Guess the number (2008) At dinner tonight, we played a number game.  First, Jay said he was thinking of a number, and we had to guess what it is.  Whoever gets it right wins.  Or, Jay went on, whoever comes closest.  Jay rambled on about some other criteria that no one understood. Danielle mercifully interrupted and excitedly guessed 8.  Jay said that was right, and so Danielle wins. I thought of a number between 1 and 100.  The kids guessed 2 and 3.  Angie guessed 57.  The number was 10.  I figured Jay and Danielle's guesses would be on the low side. Round and round we went.  Danielle said she was thinking of a number, 1 or 10.  Jay guessed 1.  So did I.  Angi...